'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the state
the people were starving while Granholm ate steak.
She looked at her administration and said with a laugh,
"We evicted them all. Who else can we shaft?"
"Please pass me the steak, I'll give it some thought,
Don't waste all this food the taxpayers bought."
She looked out the window all snowy and cold,
when up she did jump: "Let's go after the old."
We'll go after their pensions, their Medicare and all,
we'll make their lives miserable, we'll all have a ball.
They talked about prisons, the inmates and staff,
with a gleam in her eye said, "The guards we can shaft."
We'll lay off large numbers, we'll work them alone.
We don't give a darn, we're safe in OUR home.
They all raised their glasses, said a toast we must do!
"Here's to all the poor people and homeless we screw."
We'll take all their welfare, their food and their heat
we'll shut down some prisons, put the cons on the street.
We'll put them on tethers, probation and parole
and turn them all loose, with no place to go.
They won't have a job, they'll live on the street.
Their only survival is whom they rob, rape or beat.
So up they did jump after a wonderful meal.
They jumped in their foreign cars, No Ford, or Oldsmobile.
All through the night they sped like the wind
"Don't worry about tickets, the cops are all friends."
So to all of the jobless, she flashed a big grin
you had this one coming, the rich voted us in.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Wooooooooosshhhhhhhhhhhh
And that's the sound of life in the fast lane folks. Oh where, oh where has time gone? Last blog in October? That means Halloween, Thanksgiving, a kiddie birthday, and tons of work days have streamed by at lightening speed leaving little time for me to even wonder "where in the hell is all this time going?"
Work is work. Things at the new store have left little time for the old store. Getting 60+ people all on the same page can sometimes be a bit daunting but a chore that I am still warmly embracing. Slowly we are climbing the steps towards greatness, as measured by me of course, and getting a once much disorganized store into a straight line. The budget is much improved and the owner and my supervisor extremely happy. So that's good.
The kids are growing faster than I can imagine they would have. Princess is taller than me as she has been for over a year now. She's done with volleyball for this year and has moved onto Varsity Cheerleading all the while carrying a 3.94 GPA. I have no idea how she does it considering she leaves the house at 7:30am and returns well after 7pm each weekday. She comes home, does homework, grabs a bite to eat, takes a shower, and heads to bed. She attends a local University for half her day and takes accelerated Math and Science courses which hurl her thru one high school book each semester. I knew she had outsmarted me when she cruised over to me for math help. I looked at the book and said "What is this?" and she smiled and said "Trig". WTF? "I can't even spell that much less tell you how to do it kiddo." The smile on her face showed how proud she is of herself. In her junior and senior years of high school she will be taking college coursed and getting credit towards a degree. Hope the scholarships fly because this cookie is going to head to a mega college with the brain in her noggin.
Bear is the same height as I am. He is so amazingly proud of the growth, now just to catch up to daddy. He's doing so much better in school this year...except math. Wonder if having his sister tutor him is a bad idea? Probably. Seems he "chats" with a young lady in his school online. Hmmmmm....he can't possibly be old enough for girlfriends can he? Especially not if he takes after his father, I'm not ready for that chase! Although I am so glad to see that him entering his teen years has not taken his compassion and heart from him. So many teenagers seem to get moody and angry, not my bear. He still has a heart of gold and I hope it takes him far in life. He will always be the guy who everybody turns to for a shoulder to lean on. Hard to find in life.
Snookies, what in the hell can I say about him? He's started being curious about cooking and loves to help, if his interest in it can hold up. He has a tendancy to have a wandering mind so keeping the thought of "It's almost time to stir the noodles" in his head for more than two or three minutes is hard. No, he isn't ADHD or whatever that made up crap is, he's a normal ten year old boy. He's got shit to do man! He's doing well in school, thank goodness. I am just not sure I can handle another year of "He seems disinterested and lays his head on his desk often." You try to tell a ten year old who is full of life just because he is bored doesn't mean he can roll his eyes and flop his head onto his desk. The teacher thought he was being rude, he was just being him. Snookies intends very little to be rude, he just...well...he's him. His mind is always racing and looking for the next challenge in life. He does something until he gets it and understands it and masters it...then onto the next thing. School doesn't always go that way and getting him to understand it took much of last year. Next year should be better for him as he will be in middle school and able to do more.
Did I miss a kid? Ah yes, Frank. =P He's doing well, just not on his blog. I can't even begin to tell ya what he's up to with that. My loving husband endures quite a bit with me and my crazy self. Wonder if he ever thought he would one day be a friend, lover, husband, secretary, sounding board, and psychiatrist all to one person. Hell, I'm just glad he doesn't smack me and tell me to never speak to him again. He listens to all of my crazy rants, work stories, stresses of life, and wacky ideas but never tells me to shut up. I would love to say that I'd do the same for him, but I have a hard enough time putting up with my own crazy self so I'm super glad he's grounded. Without him I am not sure I could do everything I need to do in a day. Now if I could just wrangle more massages out of him...wonder if two a day is too much?
I'm super jealous of his new car. It's so pretty and makes me dream of getting one for me. But I'm not into debt and don't want to get another car payment. I don't like to have any debt over my head and that's why we don't have credit cards or any loans or other stuff. But we just hadn't saved up enough cash for this car to pay cash like we did last time, so car payments here we come! If this is what being an adult feels like, I pass. Oh well, it is a super nice car...now how do I get him to swap me it for the van? lol
Putting up the Christmas tree soon, so I guess I should wrap this up for now. No, the tree isn't up. The damn tree elves never showed up and I have had too much shit to do. So today is the day.
To all those bloggers that I follow and care for, I might not have been commenting but I have been reading. Glad to see that things seem to be looking up for everybody and I hope you all have the happiest of holidays.
Peace Out <3
Work is work. Things at the new store have left little time for the old store. Getting 60+ people all on the same page can sometimes be a bit daunting but a chore that I am still warmly embracing. Slowly we are climbing the steps towards greatness, as measured by me of course, and getting a once much disorganized store into a straight line. The budget is much improved and the owner and my supervisor extremely happy. So that's good.
The kids are growing faster than I can imagine they would have. Princess is taller than me as she has been for over a year now. She's done with volleyball for this year and has moved onto Varsity Cheerleading all the while carrying a 3.94 GPA. I have no idea how she does it considering she leaves the house at 7:30am and returns well after 7pm each weekday. She comes home, does homework, grabs a bite to eat, takes a shower, and heads to bed. She attends a local University for half her day and takes accelerated Math and Science courses which hurl her thru one high school book each semester. I knew she had outsmarted me when she cruised over to me for math help. I looked at the book and said "What is this?" and she smiled and said "Trig". WTF? "I can't even spell that much less tell you how to do it kiddo." The smile on her face showed how proud she is of herself. In her junior and senior years of high school she will be taking college coursed and getting credit towards a degree. Hope the scholarships fly because this cookie is going to head to a mega college with the brain in her noggin.
Bear is the same height as I am. He is so amazingly proud of the growth, now just to catch up to daddy. He's doing so much better in school this year...except math. Wonder if having his sister tutor him is a bad idea? Probably. Seems he "chats" with a young lady in his school online. Hmmmmm....he can't possibly be old enough for girlfriends can he? Especially not if he takes after his father, I'm not ready for that chase! Although I am so glad to see that him entering his teen years has not taken his compassion and heart from him. So many teenagers seem to get moody and angry, not my bear. He still has a heart of gold and I hope it takes him far in life. He will always be the guy who everybody turns to for a shoulder to lean on. Hard to find in life.
Snookies, what in the hell can I say about him? He's started being curious about cooking and loves to help, if his interest in it can hold up. He has a tendancy to have a wandering mind so keeping the thought of "It's almost time to stir the noodles" in his head for more than two or three minutes is hard. No, he isn't ADHD or whatever that made up crap is, he's a normal ten year old boy. He's got shit to do man! He's doing well in school, thank goodness. I am just not sure I can handle another year of "He seems disinterested and lays his head on his desk often." You try to tell a ten year old who is full of life just because he is bored doesn't mean he can roll his eyes and flop his head onto his desk. The teacher thought he was being rude, he was just being him. Snookies intends very little to be rude, he just...well...he's him. His mind is always racing and looking for the next challenge in life. He does something until he gets it and understands it and masters it...then onto the next thing. School doesn't always go that way and getting him to understand it took much of last year. Next year should be better for him as he will be in middle school and able to do more.
Did I miss a kid? Ah yes, Frank. =P He's doing well, just not on his blog. I can't even begin to tell ya what he's up to with that. My loving husband endures quite a bit with me and my crazy self. Wonder if he ever thought he would one day be a friend, lover, husband, secretary, sounding board, and psychiatrist all to one person. Hell, I'm just glad he doesn't smack me and tell me to never speak to him again. He listens to all of my crazy rants, work stories, stresses of life, and wacky ideas but never tells me to shut up. I would love to say that I'd do the same for him, but I have a hard enough time putting up with my own crazy self so I'm super glad he's grounded. Without him I am not sure I could do everything I need to do in a day. Now if I could just wrangle more massages out of him...wonder if two a day is too much?
I'm super jealous of his new car. It's so pretty and makes me dream of getting one for me. But I'm not into debt and don't want to get another car payment. I don't like to have any debt over my head and that's why we don't have credit cards or any loans or other stuff. But we just hadn't saved up enough cash for this car to pay cash like we did last time, so car payments here we come! If this is what being an adult feels like, I pass. Oh well, it is a super nice car...now how do I get him to swap me it for the van? lol
Putting up the Christmas tree soon, so I guess I should wrap this up for now. No, the tree isn't up. The damn tree elves never showed up and I have had too much shit to do. So today is the day.
To all those bloggers that I follow and care for, I might not have been commenting but I have been reading. Glad to see that things seem to be looking up for everybody and I hope you all have the happiest of holidays.
Peace Out <3
Friday, October 26, 2007
Fun was had by all...eventually
So Princess has been asking for several weeks to have some friends over for a small Halloween party. And after last year's gigantic one where it looked like a concert had let out when parents picked their kids up afterwards, a small party sounded a-ok to me.
So after a long day of work for both the Daddy guy and the Momma, we come home to eight children in the house...six of which are teenage girls. The volume level was at a maximum by the time the pizzas were delivered. So we load them full of pizza, soda, and candy. What to do after that? Load them into two vehicles and head to the "Haunted Jail" in hopes of scaring the shit out of them.
I got all the girls in the van ride (I think I lost a bet somehow) and Frank had the two boys. A van of six teenage girls versus two preteen boys? Frank, you owe me! lol
Anyway, by the time we hit the parking lot of the place, the girls are all riled up and a few were on the verge of quitting. So we stand in what we thought was the line for tickets for like five minutes before the front door of the place opens up and a friendly face pokes out and says "If you are here for the Haunted Jail, come on up." Duh! So in we went. The Daddy guy paid for all the tickets and even bought the kids (plus himself) glownecklaces. Then we stood in the little waiting room with dim lights as they played a documentary of what the jail is all about...just enough to scare the crap out of us again!
So the Daddy guy and I each had to go in with one of the boys since anybody under the age of 13 has to be with an adult. We get split up from the girls and sent in ahead of them. The first part, you are put into a jail cell and the door shut behind you.
Bear and I head into one cell and Frank and DJ into the one across the way. The famous murderer is "Killjoy". As Bear and I are shut into our cell the creepy guy who escorted us in says "Cell number seven, the home of Killjoy." Oh super! We huddle in the cell against the far wall so we can keep an eye on the door. Some creepy ass noises go off and then the strobe effect starts and we notice that the back of the cell is not a solid door like the front but metal bars...and there is a dude with a mask and jailbird outfit creeping around behind them. Bear and I wiggle our way back to the front of the cell and into the corner. He starts to whimper that he doesn't want to be there anymore and wants to leave. I try to comfort him and tell him it will be ok and then Killjoy starts howling "I want the boy, it's not ok. Get out of me home. I want the boy."
This sends Bear into full panic mode and he's trying to get inside the corner of the cell, like literally in the wall to escape the murderer. Killjoy wanders away from the back and we can't see him anymore and figure we are safe. So I hug Bear and tell him it's all ok, it's just pretend...and all of a sudded...the front door opens and Killjoy is face to face with Bear howling in a very ominous voice "It's not ok. I want the boy. Come here boy. This is my home boy. It's not ok. I want the boy." Over and over. I comfort Bear the whole time and keep one eye on Killjoy. Poor Bear was petrified! I think the actor knew it and so he slid out of the cell. As I comfort him and tell him it's ok, from across the hallway I hear a little voice say "Wassup?" I tell ya, I thought DJ had balls of steel for saying that to the person as they came into his cell to scare his ass.
Then we are all asked to exit our cells after a few more minutes of terrifying noises and the creepy Killjoy wandering behind the metal bars. I tell ya, Bear and I thought it was a joke! So we stayed put. We knew Killjoy was just in the hallway and there was no way we were walking out into his trap. Then we heard the other cells open and the guide tell people to please shut their doors behind them so we could continue to the upstairs attic. Must be safe! So we crept out and noticed that all was good. We exited into another little hallway area before being escorted upstairs...and thank goodness for that! This hallway was the safe haven for DJ and Bear, they both said they were NOT going any further! So I took the brave ones outside while the Daddy guy continued on with his fright fest.
While waiting outside we discovered that DJ had actually had his eyes covered pretty much the whole time!
After Frank came out, we waited for the girls to exit. I was positive one of them was going to atleast bail after the first part. But they all toughed it out and went thru the whole thing. They came out...laughing! The excitement of it all had all of us talking about our experience for the next hour. Seems the girls were scared pretty good, but chose to act tough and turn it into fun and laugh at it.
There was so much fun had, I'm sure we will do it again next year...I think.
So after a long day of work for both the Daddy guy and the Momma, we come home to eight children in the house...six of which are teenage girls. The volume level was at a maximum by the time the pizzas were delivered. So we load them full of pizza, soda, and candy. What to do after that? Load them into two vehicles and head to the "Haunted Jail" in hopes of scaring the shit out of them.
I got all the girls in the van ride (I think I lost a bet somehow) and Frank had the two boys. A van of six teenage girls versus two preteen boys? Frank, you owe me! lol
Anyway, by the time we hit the parking lot of the place, the girls are all riled up and a few were on the verge of quitting. So we stand in what we thought was the line for tickets for like five minutes before the front door of the place opens up and a friendly face pokes out and says "If you are here for the Haunted Jail, come on up." Duh! So in we went. The Daddy guy paid for all the tickets and even bought the kids (plus himself) glownecklaces. Then we stood in the little waiting room with dim lights as they played a documentary of what the jail is all about...just enough to scare the crap out of us again!
So the Daddy guy and I each had to go in with one of the boys since anybody under the age of 13 has to be with an adult. We get split up from the girls and sent in ahead of them. The first part, you are put into a jail cell and the door shut behind you.
Bear and I head into one cell and Frank and DJ into the one across the way. The famous murderer is "Killjoy". As Bear and I are shut into our cell the creepy guy who escorted us in says "Cell number seven, the home of Killjoy." Oh super! We huddle in the cell against the far wall so we can keep an eye on the door. Some creepy ass noises go off and then the strobe effect starts and we notice that the back of the cell is not a solid door like the front but metal bars...and there is a dude with a mask and jailbird outfit creeping around behind them. Bear and I wiggle our way back to the front of the cell and into the corner. He starts to whimper that he doesn't want to be there anymore and wants to leave. I try to comfort him and tell him it will be ok and then Killjoy starts howling "I want the boy, it's not ok. Get out of me home. I want the boy."
This sends Bear into full panic mode and he's trying to get inside the corner of the cell, like literally in the wall to escape the murderer. Killjoy wanders away from the back and we can't see him anymore and figure we are safe. So I hug Bear and tell him it's all ok, it's just pretend...and all of a sudded...the front door opens and Killjoy is face to face with Bear howling in a very ominous voice "It's not ok. I want the boy. Come here boy. This is my home boy. It's not ok. I want the boy." Over and over. I comfort Bear the whole time and keep one eye on Killjoy. Poor Bear was petrified! I think the actor knew it and so he slid out of the cell. As I comfort him and tell him it's ok, from across the hallway I hear a little voice say "Wassup?" I tell ya, I thought DJ had balls of steel for saying that to the person as they came into his cell to scare his ass.
Then we are all asked to exit our cells after a few more minutes of terrifying noises and the creepy Killjoy wandering behind the metal bars. I tell ya, Bear and I thought it was a joke! So we stayed put. We knew Killjoy was just in the hallway and there was no way we were walking out into his trap. Then we heard the other cells open and the guide tell people to please shut their doors behind them so we could continue to the upstairs attic. Must be safe! So we crept out and noticed that all was good. We exited into another little hallway area before being escorted upstairs...and thank goodness for that! This hallway was the safe haven for DJ and Bear, they both said they were NOT going any further! So I took the brave ones outside while the Daddy guy continued on with his fright fest.
While waiting outside we discovered that DJ had actually had his eyes covered pretty much the whole time!
After Frank came out, we waited for the girls to exit. I was positive one of them was going to atleast bail after the first part. But they all toughed it out and went thru the whole thing. They came out...laughing! The excitement of it all had all of us talking about our experience for the next hour. Seems the girls were scared pretty good, but chose to act tough and turn it into fun and laugh at it.
There was so much fun had, I'm sure we will do it again next year...I think.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Some tit for tat ya might say.
Our lovable Josie has a "One Question Wednesday" where anybody can ask her a question and there are no limits. The only catch, and it's a fun one, is that she gets to ask one in return. I finally made it to her site on a Wednesday and got a chance to partake in the fun. Here's my question from Josie...
""If fate had taken you down a different path, and you hadn't met up with the infamous Mr. Frank, what dreams did you have for your future, and what do you think your life would have been like now? "
Wow! I'm not even quite sure. We met when we were in High School, the 10th grade to be exact. I can honestly say that I had not planned anything for my future. I had no thoughts on what I wanted to do or who I wanted to become.
I believe that if we had not met, I would most definately not live in the hellish state that we currently live in. I would probably still be living in Virginia Beach, Virginia. I can see that I would have gone to college and would have found myself somewhere in the medical field as science and living creatures have always interested me. A veterinarian, medical assistant, medical transcriptionist, or possibly a zoologist. I can see that I would have gone in that direction. As for relationships, I'd probably still be single as it was Frank who "got me out of my shell" and taught me that it is ok to just be me.
That might be an odd response to the question, but it's the truth. Other than what I put, my mind is a blank. So it's possible I would have just become a damn bum! lol
""If fate had taken you down a different path, and you hadn't met up with the infamous Mr. Frank, what dreams did you have for your future, and what do you think your life would have been like now? "
Wow! I'm not even quite sure. We met when we were in High School, the 10th grade to be exact. I can honestly say that I had not planned anything for my future. I had no thoughts on what I wanted to do or who I wanted to become.
I believe that if we had not met, I would most definately not live in the hellish state that we currently live in. I would probably still be living in Virginia Beach, Virginia. I can see that I would have gone to college and would have found myself somewhere in the medical field as science and living creatures have always interested me. A veterinarian, medical assistant, medical transcriptionist, or possibly a zoologist. I can see that I would have gone in that direction. As for relationships, I'd probably still be single as it was Frank who "got me out of my shell" and taught me that it is ok to just be me.
That might be an odd response to the question, but it's the truth. Other than what I put, my mind is a blank. So it's possible I would have just become a damn bum! lol
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Frank's retirement To-Do list
Master grocery shopping, without bringing home any live critters in the brown sacks.
Serving dinner, without having to take it out of the take-out sack it was brought home in.
Be my accountant, without me having to remind you what a due date is.
Become a laundry professional, without us having to get dressed out of the "clean" basket.
Massage me regularly, without me having to beg.
You get those five things down to a science and we'll talk retirement. But ya know, if you want I'll buy you a new car in a few months. That do anything for you? How about if you keep working, save your entire paycheck, and then use that for your "Frank needs video games" fund?
Screw it, if you honest to God want to quit...we can discuss it. lmao
Serving dinner, without having to take it out of the take-out sack it was brought home in.
Be my accountant, without me having to remind you what a due date is.
Become a laundry professional, without us having to get dressed out of the "clean" basket.
Massage me regularly, without me having to beg.
You get those five things down to a science and we'll talk retirement. But ya know, if you want I'll buy you a new car in a few months. That do anything for you? How about if you keep working, save your entire paycheck, and then use that for your "Frank needs video games" fund?
Screw it, if you honest to God want to quit...we can discuss it. lmao
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Since Frank is lazy
How Patches came to be in our family...since Frank is lazy and just says "look for it." lol Ya shithead!
Patches O'Fluff
Patches O'Fluff
Interview's last lovin' Part 5
5. Your husband is a colorful character, to say the least. Tell us about your craziest adventure with him. What does he do that makes you laugh? What does he do that makes you cry? Why don't you like his cat? What is your secret to making this marriage work?
Colorful, huh! That says a mouthful all in one word. We have had so many adventures, where to even begin and better yet how much to actually share?
One adventure, if you want to call it that, was when he was teaching me to drive. On one trip around town it started to rain. So he explained how to turn on the wipers. Then it started to pour and I simply couldn't see no matter how fast the wipers went. So as I drove extremely slow while crying that I just couldn't see and could not continue, he lovingly supported me while I came to a dead stop in the middle of the road to switch seats with him so he could drive my crazed ass to the comfort of our house.
Another adventure was buying our house. And that one seemed like it would take forever! We applied. Were denied over a credit report mistake. Cleared up the mistake. Got approved. House hunted. (There's another story for ya.) Found the house of our dreams. Made an offer. Had the offer accepted. Waited for the final paperwork. Signed a butt load of money over. Moved in.
House hunting is fun, but especially when you go to a modular home lot with Frank! So we go to a modular home lot that looked like it had some nice houses on it even though Frank was dead set against getting a modular home...I insisted we atleast look. One of the sales guys greets us and we explain to him that we are looking and had already been pre-approved for a home loan in $X amount. So he writes a list of houses on the back of a business card that were in our price range, tells us to go look around at those houses, and says he will meet up with us in a bit. We set off looking at the ones on the card. Frank sits on every toilet and lays in every bathtub in each of the houses! I holler at him each time he does it because somebody could come in and see him being a screwball and embarass me. Frank? He thinks it funny! As we make our way around the circle of homes we are right in front of the office and see one that is huge for a modular home. We decide that even though it is not on the list we should take a peek in and see why it's so huge. The door was locked! But we noticed there were people in it so we wait for one of them to open the door so we could go inside. BUT before we get that chance we hear from behind us "Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank. Is that one of the houses on your list?" Ok, at the time the salesman's tone was quite humiliating and embarassing. But later on that day it led to many laughing fits as one of us would repeat his mocking tone. We never did buy a modular, that one guy soured me on the idea.
Ok, for the next few there needs to be a full out WARNING! WARNING, IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO HEAR OR READ OF SEXUAL ACTS BETWEEN THE HUBBY AND I DO NOT, I REPEAT DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER!
So before we were married and were teenagers in love, sex was something we lived for and made time for numerous times a day...everyday. Well, when Frank was at my house visiting, sex was a no-no as my mother just could not know that we did THAT! Being a teenager quickly got the better of us...well me, he's just like that. We were out front of the house and Frank convinced me to go inside and take off my panties. (I don't think it took him long to convince me either, I was pretty giving of the panties for him.) When I came back outside he slid me onto the hood of my mother's car, stood in front of me, pulled my legs to either side of him, slid my shorts off to the side, and we did what teenagers do...right there on the hood of my mother's car! Soooooo...we did it many more times. Once, my neighbor came over to ask if I needed a ride to school the next day and we had to mask what we were doing by pretending to be just hugging and cuddling. On another ocassion, one of which my sister later informed my mother of, my mom walked into the garage, turned the light on, saw us out front, and waved at us. FRANK ACTUALLY WAVED BACK! Who the hell waves at somebody elses mother while having sex? That man ain't wrapped too tight!
Then there was the adventure that nearly killed us, and I mean literally. Way back when Frank's neck was broken and I had to drive him to the Doctor's office for checkups and such, we noted a little porn shop on the outskirts of the town where the Doctor's office was. So one day we decided on our next trip we would stop in and see what was what. Like good sex crazed people, we dropped in after the next Dr. visit. Oh my lord! The things in that store made my head swim. Frank encouraged me to find a toy that I thougth I would like. Far too many choices, so I asked him to help find something. So we wander around and around and then Frank spots it...a butterfly. Now I had no idea what in the hell it was so Frank the sex expert explains that it's a vibrator that is shaped like a butterfly and doesn't actually get inserted. Ya see, it has these little straps that you wear around your legs so that the butterfly thingy sits comfortably between your legs and massages you in all sorts of heavenly ways. The kicker...it has a remote! SOLD! After they do the usual of making sure it works by putting batteries in it and turning it on before you leave the store (I hate when the cashier plays with my toys before I do) we head out of the store and get in the van. Now, I must note that with Frank's neck injusy he is not able to drive so I did all the driving back then. As I turn the van on, Frank says in his lovable voice "Pull into the back and put it on." After about two seconds of arguing with him, I did just that. I pulled behind the store, slid out of my panties, put my new butterfly friend on, and then started to drive us back home. The first part of the trip home was a tingly, heavenly trip as Frank sat next to me and operated the remote for my butterfly friend and sent me into realms of pleasure that just should not be experienced during the day and in public. Now with me being in that state of mind and Frank being lost in his world of complete control over my body without even having to touch me...we hit the S-curves...at 70 mph! Now it wasn't the S-curves nor the speed that almost killed us, it was Frank switching it to full blast as I rounded one curve with an on coming semi truck barreling towards us and me not being able to focus and swerving into the other lane! I swerved back into our lane, we gained control of our senses, pulled over onto the side of the road, and placed my butterfly friend back into it's box for the remainder of the trip home. And you bet your ass on every trip to the "goodie store" after that, we just salivate over the toys until we get home...except for the time we bought flavored lube and I made him tatse it before we left the parking lot! lmao
OK, enough of the adventures for now or we will never get done with the interview.
What does Frank do to make me laugh? What doesn't he do might be easier! Frank lives to entertain and make others laugh. He has damn near killed Spot with laughter before, several times. He makes sarcastic comments. He walks funny while distorting his face. He pokes fun at himself. He lives life to it's fullest, and that often drags those around him into entertainmentville. He just enjoys life and laughs at every moment he can, which is quite contagious.
What does he do to make me cry? Not much, believe it or not Frank actually goes out of his way to make me not cry. But when it happens, he comforts me and holds me close to his chest until I am done. When we were younger we would fight, and it often got ugly. I will admit that I would sometimes cry intentionally because I knew that it would end the fight right away. Frank is just not the type of person who can see somebody he cares about cry and not fix it for them.
Ahhhh, his freakin' cat! Patches O'Fluff to be exact. Patches is a Maine Coon, or however you spell that damn breed. Part of that breed's nature is similar to a dog, well a puppy to be more exact. They need constant love and often mimic dog behavior. When I had my dog, Caesar who was half German Shepard and half St. Bernard who weighed about 150 pounds, Patches wanted nothing more than to have Caesar love him. Caesar? He wanted nothing to do with that cat. Patches would sit by Caesar as he drank from the water bowl and watch the waves in the bowl as Caesar's overgrown tongue lapped at the water. Then when Caesar was done, Patches would stride over to the bowl, swat at the water with his furry paw to make similar waves, then lap at the water until the waves stopped, and then repeat the above actions until he was done drinking. And then he'd sit on my lap wet paw and all! Patches also doesn't like to bathe, I think it's because he never saw Caesar do it so why should he do it. So Patches is kind of a skanky and long haired "puppy" who has an insane obsession with getting and maintaining Frank's every waking moment of love and attention. He'll stop at nothing to be loved by Frank. Patches will sit next to him and tap Frank until he gets love. He'll slam his head into our shut bedroom door until we let him in for some Frank love. He sneaks under the covers just to be close to Frank. He lets Frank cuddle him like a stuffed teddy bear. I guess as much as I give Frank shit over his damn cat, I love the little fluffy thing for loving Frank so much and making him happy. Frank will have to share his story on how Patches became part of our whacky family.
Our secret to making our marriage work? Love and understanding. We both do things that annoy the other, but we understand that it is just how the other is. We don't try to change one another, we just accept the other...faults and all. That's another thing, don't point out the faults. Trust me, that just makes it worse. Willingness. You have to both be willing to help the other out and do things you might not really want to do. But it has to be returned in kind. Marriage is really a two-lane road. You have to be willing to travel both sides of the road, take detours when needed, stop at stop signs, hit the gas to get up the hills, and roll the windows down to enjoy the breeze that passes you by. Other than that, I'm not real sure what we are doing that makes it work. I just know I enjoy it and am all the better for it.
Josie, thank you my friend for the chance to answer some loving questions. I enjoyed every moment of it. I hope the answers were worth the time and thought that you put into the questions.
Colorful, huh! That says a mouthful all in one word. We have had so many adventures, where to even begin and better yet how much to actually share?
One adventure, if you want to call it that, was when he was teaching me to drive. On one trip around town it started to rain. So he explained how to turn on the wipers. Then it started to pour and I simply couldn't see no matter how fast the wipers went. So as I drove extremely slow while crying that I just couldn't see and could not continue, he lovingly supported me while I came to a dead stop in the middle of the road to switch seats with him so he could drive my crazed ass to the comfort of our house.
Another adventure was buying our house. And that one seemed like it would take forever! We applied. Were denied over a credit report mistake. Cleared up the mistake. Got approved. House hunted. (There's another story for ya.) Found the house of our dreams. Made an offer. Had the offer accepted. Waited for the final paperwork. Signed a butt load of money over. Moved in.
House hunting is fun, but especially when you go to a modular home lot with Frank! So we go to a modular home lot that looked like it had some nice houses on it even though Frank was dead set against getting a modular home...I insisted we atleast look. One of the sales guys greets us and we explain to him that we are looking and had already been pre-approved for a home loan in $X amount. So he writes a list of houses on the back of a business card that were in our price range, tells us to go look around at those houses, and says he will meet up with us in a bit. We set off looking at the ones on the card. Frank sits on every toilet and lays in every bathtub in each of the houses! I holler at him each time he does it because somebody could come in and see him being a screwball and embarass me. Frank? He thinks it funny! As we make our way around the circle of homes we are right in front of the office and see one that is huge for a modular home. We decide that even though it is not on the list we should take a peek in and see why it's so huge. The door was locked! But we noticed there were people in it so we wait for one of them to open the door so we could go inside. BUT before we get that chance we hear from behind us "Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank, Frank. Is that one of the houses on your list?" Ok, at the time the salesman's tone was quite humiliating and embarassing. But later on that day it led to many laughing fits as one of us would repeat his mocking tone. We never did buy a modular, that one guy soured me on the idea.
Ok, for the next few there needs to be a full out WARNING! WARNING, IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO HEAR OR READ OF SEXUAL ACTS BETWEEN THE HUBBY AND I DO NOT, I REPEAT DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER!
So before we were married and were teenagers in love, sex was something we lived for and made time for numerous times a day...everyday. Well, when Frank was at my house visiting, sex was a no-no as my mother just could not know that we did THAT! Being a teenager quickly got the better of us...well me, he's just like that. We were out front of the house and Frank convinced me to go inside and take off my panties. (I don't think it took him long to convince me either, I was pretty giving of the panties for him.) When I came back outside he slid me onto the hood of my mother's car, stood in front of me, pulled my legs to either side of him, slid my shorts off to the side, and we did what teenagers do...right there on the hood of my mother's car! Soooooo...we did it many more times. Once, my neighbor came over to ask if I needed a ride to school the next day and we had to mask what we were doing by pretending to be just hugging and cuddling. On another ocassion, one of which my sister later informed my mother of, my mom walked into the garage, turned the light on, saw us out front, and waved at us. FRANK ACTUALLY WAVED BACK! Who the hell waves at somebody elses mother while having sex? That man ain't wrapped too tight!
Then there was the adventure that nearly killed us, and I mean literally. Way back when Frank's neck was broken and I had to drive him to the Doctor's office for checkups and such, we noted a little porn shop on the outskirts of the town where the Doctor's office was. So one day we decided on our next trip we would stop in and see what was what. Like good sex crazed people, we dropped in after the next Dr. visit. Oh my lord! The things in that store made my head swim. Frank encouraged me to find a toy that I thougth I would like. Far too many choices, so I asked him to help find something. So we wander around and around and then Frank spots it...a butterfly. Now I had no idea what in the hell it was so Frank the sex expert explains that it's a vibrator that is shaped like a butterfly and doesn't actually get inserted. Ya see, it has these little straps that you wear around your legs so that the butterfly thingy sits comfortably between your legs and massages you in all sorts of heavenly ways. The kicker...it has a remote! SOLD! After they do the usual of making sure it works by putting batteries in it and turning it on before you leave the store (I hate when the cashier plays with my toys before I do) we head out of the store and get in the van. Now, I must note that with Frank's neck injusy he is not able to drive so I did all the driving back then. As I turn the van on, Frank says in his lovable voice "Pull into the back and put it on." After about two seconds of arguing with him, I did just that. I pulled behind the store, slid out of my panties, put my new butterfly friend on, and then started to drive us back home. The first part of the trip home was a tingly, heavenly trip as Frank sat next to me and operated the remote for my butterfly friend and sent me into realms of pleasure that just should not be experienced during the day and in public. Now with me being in that state of mind and Frank being lost in his world of complete control over my body without even having to touch me...we hit the S-curves...at 70 mph! Now it wasn't the S-curves nor the speed that almost killed us, it was Frank switching it to full blast as I rounded one curve with an on coming semi truck barreling towards us and me not being able to focus and swerving into the other lane! I swerved back into our lane, we gained control of our senses, pulled over onto the side of the road, and placed my butterfly friend back into it's box for the remainder of the trip home. And you bet your ass on every trip to the "goodie store" after that, we just salivate over the toys until we get home...except for the time we bought flavored lube and I made him tatse it before we left the parking lot! lmao
OK, enough of the adventures for now or we will never get done with the interview.
What does Frank do to make me laugh? What doesn't he do might be easier! Frank lives to entertain and make others laugh. He has damn near killed Spot with laughter before, several times. He makes sarcastic comments. He walks funny while distorting his face. He pokes fun at himself. He lives life to it's fullest, and that often drags those around him into entertainmentville. He just enjoys life and laughs at every moment he can, which is quite contagious.
What does he do to make me cry? Not much, believe it or not Frank actually goes out of his way to make me not cry. But when it happens, he comforts me and holds me close to his chest until I am done. When we were younger we would fight, and it often got ugly. I will admit that I would sometimes cry intentionally because I knew that it would end the fight right away. Frank is just not the type of person who can see somebody he cares about cry and not fix it for them.
Ahhhh, his freakin' cat! Patches O'Fluff to be exact. Patches is a Maine Coon, or however you spell that damn breed. Part of that breed's nature is similar to a dog, well a puppy to be more exact. They need constant love and often mimic dog behavior. When I had my dog, Caesar who was half German Shepard and half St. Bernard who weighed about 150 pounds, Patches wanted nothing more than to have Caesar love him. Caesar? He wanted nothing to do with that cat. Patches would sit by Caesar as he drank from the water bowl and watch the waves in the bowl as Caesar's overgrown tongue lapped at the water. Then when Caesar was done, Patches would stride over to the bowl, swat at the water with his furry paw to make similar waves, then lap at the water until the waves stopped, and then repeat the above actions until he was done drinking. And then he'd sit on my lap wet paw and all! Patches also doesn't like to bathe, I think it's because he never saw Caesar do it so why should he do it. So Patches is kind of a skanky and long haired "puppy" who has an insane obsession with getting and maintaining Frank's every waking moment of love and attention. He'll stop at nothing to be loved by Frank. Patches will sit next to him and tap Frank until he gets love. He'll slam his head into our shut bedroom door until we let him in for some Frank love. He sneaks under the covers just to be close to Frank. He lets Frank cuddle him like a stuffed teddy bear. I guess as much as I give Frank shit over his damn cat, I love the little fluffy thing for loving Frank so much and making him happy. Frank will have to share his story on how Patches became part of our whacky family.
Our secret to making our marriage work? Love and understanding. We both do things that annoy the other, but we understand that it is just how the other is. We don't try to change one another, we just accept the other...faults and all. That's another thing, don't point out the faults. Trust me, that just makes it worse. Willingness. You have to both be willing to help the other out and do things you might not really want to do. But it has to be returned in kind. Marriage is really a two-lane road. You have to be willing to travel both sides of the road, take detours when needed, stop at stop signs, hit the gas to get up the hills, and roll the windows down to enjoy the breeze that passes you by. Other than that, I'm not real sure what we are doing that makes it work. I just know I enjoy it and am all the better for it.
Josie, thank you my friend for the chance to answer some loving questions. I enjoyed every moment of it. I hope the answers were worth the time and thought that you put into the questions.
Part 4 of my Josie lovin'
4. Your mother-in-law died of cancer long before you had a chance to meet her. Your own mother has twice battled cancer and won. In a wonderful post entitled,"Why Do I Relay?" you spoke of your dedication to finding a cure for this horrible disease. Tell me what it felt like to be the daughter of a parent battling cancer. Do you now live in fear of it returning? How has this experience changed you?
Being the daughter of a parent battling cancer made me feel completely helpless and out of control. There was nothing I could do to make it better for her. I went with her to have surgery, hugged her everytime I saw her, told her how much I love her, massaged her when she felt ok to be massaged, helped take care of her cat, and helped with her bills while she was out of work. None of that compared to how miserable I felt that I just simply could not make the pain go away. There was nothing I could do to make it better and making it tolerable wasn't ok with me. My mother is the person who gives and gives and gives without ever asking for anything in return or expecting anything in return. How unfair was it that this was happening to her...and twice! I was angry that it was her it happened to. I would have gave anything to trade places with her, anything. And there was nothing I could do to save her when she needed somebody to save her. My sister and I shared with her and put her life in the hands of God and her doctor. They saved her and I couldn't. I wanted desperately to hug her and make it all go away and yet I couldn't. I was helpless and pissed off at being helpless. I kept all that from her, I had to be her strength for she had none during all of the treatments. So I stayed by her side and was her support until she once again had her own strength. I know there was nothing that I could have done to help her more than what I was doing, and that feeling was miserable. I'm glad it's over and she is healed.
I worry that her cancer might come back yet I don't live in fear of it. She sees an oncologist regularly for check ups to assure she is still cancer free and so far things are looking pretty good. We spoke on the topic of "living in fear" and I told her that if we looked at life in that manner we might miss living our lives. Fear is not something that we should live for. For all the worries she has had about cancer returning, I know that she does not dwell on the matter. As she says "if it comes back, we'll deal with it then." I'm with her on that one, so if that day comes we will deal with it then...but not until that day.
That experience definately changed me in one way. I make sure to tell everybody that matters to me and that I love exactly that. I make sure to let those who I care about know that I do indeed care about them. I don't ever want to lose somebody special and worry that they didn't know exactly how much they meant to me. I want to cherish everybody while I still have them.
Being the daughter of a parent battling cancer made me feel completely helpless and out of control. There was nothing I could do to make it better for her. I went with her to have surgery, hugged her everytime I saw her, told her how much I love her, massaged her when she felt ok to be massaged, helped take care of her cat, and helped with her bills while she was out of work. None of that compared to how miserable I felt that I just simply could not make the pain go away. There was nothing I could do to make it better and making it tolerable wasn't ok with me. My mother is the person who gives and gives and gives without ever asking for anything in return or expecting anything in return. How unfair was it that this was happening to her...and twice! I was angry that it was her it happened to. I would have gave anything to trade places with her, anything. And there was nothing I could do to save her when she needed somebody to save her. My sister and I shared with her and put her life in the hands of God and her doctor. They saved her and I couldn't. I wanted desperately to hug her and make it all go away and yet I couldn't. I was helpless and pissed off at being helpless. I kept all that from her, I had to be her strength for she had none during all of the treatments. So I stayed by her side and was her support until she once again had her own strength. I know there was nothing that I could have done to help her more than what I was doing, and that feeling was miserable. I'm glad it's over and she is healed.
I worry that her cancer might come back yet I don't live in fear of it. She sees an oncologist regularly for check ups to assure she is still cancer free and so far things are looking pretty good. We spoke on the topic of "living in fear" and I told her that if we looked at life in that manner we might miss living our lives. Fear is not something that we should live for. For all the worries she has had about cancer returning, I know that she does not dwell on the matter. As she says "if it comes back, we'll deal with it then." I'm with her on that one, so if that day comes we will deal with it then...but not until that day.
That experience definately changed me in one way. I make sure to tell everybody that matters to me and that I love exactly that. I make sure to let those who I care about know that I do indeed care about them. I don't ever want to lose somebody special and worry that they didn't know exactly how much they meant to me. I want to cherish everybody while I still have them.
More Josie interview lovin' Part 3
3. I know very little about your life as a child. What is your happiest memory from that period? How do the childhoods of sons and daughter differ from your own? What personality traits did each of them inherit from you? If you could give each of them one piece of advice to carry with them in life, what would it be?
My happiest memory from childhood is also one of my saddest that quickly turned into my happiest. When I was 9 years old the only thing I had my heart set on getting was a stuffed Strawberry Shortcake doll that had long, braided red hair tucked under a strawberry scented hat. I had spent hours staring at her when we would go to the store and knew exactly what I would be asking Santa for that year. Christmas time came and my sister and I tore into our presents. I can not even begin to tell you what she got, but I know what I got. Shirts, socks, five records, a record player, and a pair of roller skates. My mother always tried so hard to get us everything that we wanted and I know now that the look on my face must have broke her heart because she asked what was wrong. Holding back the tears of sadness for not having anything that I considered something I could "play" with I told her nothing. She looked around at what I had gotten and asked "Where's your doll?" I told her I didn't get a doll but my sister had indeed gotten a barbie. Mom didn't quite believe me so she looked around, under the wrapping paper, and then gasped as she ran out of the room only to return a moment later holding the most cherished doll that I had so desperately wanted. Mom hugged me with tears of apology for forgetting to wrap her up for me as I hugged the doll I had so lovingly adored at the store. I thanked her to no end for my doll and she apologized. That day we both made a mistake. She forgot to wrap a simple present and I forgot to be thankful for what I had gotten instead of being miserable for what I had not gotten. So that Christmas turned out to be the happiest day of my childhood for I knew then more than I had ever that my mother loved me more than anything...and I got the doll that I went on to cherish for years.
The thing that stands out the most as being different between my children's and my own childhood is that my children are growing up in a home with two parents and don't have to split their time between parents. My parents were married until I was 11 or so but with a father in the Navy, were they ever really together? I felt that I had to always reassure the other parent that I loved them equally and not one more than the other. I don't know that either of them actually knew that tho. Which brings me to the other thing that is drastically different between their childhood and mine, freedom of speech. I was told that I could tell my parents anything, but I knew they didn't mean it. There were just some things I knew they didn't want to hear. But in our house now, my children can say anything to us and I am pretty darn sure they know it.
Princess inherited my attitude...good and bad. She also has my looks. Bear inherited my compassion towards others. DJ inherited my competitiveness.
There are so many things I want to advise my children on in life. I want them to give love freely but I don't want them to get hurt by doing so. I want them to choose paths in life that they want and to not feel forced into a particular path. I want them to have jobs that make them happy. I want them to live for themselves. Do things they want to do. Experience the things they want to experience. I want them to live life, not just watch as it passes them by.
My happiest memory from childhood is also one of my saddest that quickly turned into my happiest. When I was 9 years old the only thing I had my heart set on getting was a stuffed Strawberry Shortcake doll that had long, braided red hair tucked under a strawberry scented hat. I had spent hours staring at her when we would go to the store and knew exactly what I would be asking Santa for that year. Christmas time came and my sister and I tore into our presents. I can not even begin to tell you what she got, but I know what I got. Shirts, socks, five records, a record player, and a pair of roller skates. My mother always tried so hard to get us everything that we wanted and I know now that the look on my face must have broke her heart because she asked what was wrong. Holding back the tears of sadness for not having anything that I considered something I could "play" with I told her nothing. She looked around at what I had gotten and asked "Where's your doll?" I told her I didn't get a doll but my sister had indeed gotten a barbie. Mom didn't quite believe me so she looked around, under the wrapping paper, and then gasped as she ran out of the room only to return a moment later holding the most cherished doll that I had so desperately wanted. Mom hugged me with tears of apology for forgetting to wrap her up for me as I hugged the doll I had so lovingly adored at the store. I thanked her to no end for my doll and she apologized. That day we both made a mistake. She forgot to wrap a simple present and I forgot to be thankful for what I had gotten instead of being miserable for what I had not gotten. So that Christmas turned out to be the happiest day of my childhood for I knew then more than I had ever that my mother loved me more than anything...and I got the doll that I went on to cherish for years.
The thing that stands out the most as being different between my children's and my own childhood is that my children are growing up in a home with two parents and don't have to split their time between parents. My parents were married until I was 11 or so but with a father in the Navy, were they ever really together? I felt that I had to always reassure the other parent that I loved them equally and not one more than the other. I don't know that either of them actually knew that tho. Which brings me to the other thing that is drastically different between their childhood and mine, freedom of speech. I was told that I could tell my parents anything, but I knew they didn't mean it. There were just some things I knew they didn't want to hear. But in our house now, my children can say anything to us and I am pretty darn sure they know it.
Princess inherited my attitude...good and bad. She also has my looks. Bear inherited my compassion towards others. DJ inherited my competitiveness.
There are so many things I want to advise my children on in life. I want them to give love freely but I don't want them to get hurt by doing so. I want them to choose paths in life that they want and to not feel forced into a particular path. I want them to have jobs that make them happy. I want them to live for themselves. Do things they want to do. Experience the things they want to experience. I want them to live life, not just watch as it passes them by.
Some Josie lovin' Part 2
2. You have written that "It's best to make a decision, stick with it, and learn from it if it was the good decision to make or not." We all have a few regrets. If you could have one "Undo" in your life, what moment in your past would you use it for? What is the worst decision you have ever made, and what did you learn from that experience? What has been the best decision? If one of your children was making a decision that you strongly disagreed with, at what point would you intervene?
Hmmm, if I could have one "undo". I honestly don't think I would use my "undo" for any moment in my life. Everything I have done or experienced helped make me who I am today, and I am pretty comfortable and satisfied with who I am. Sure I have said things in the past that I probably shouldn't have said, but were they things that were true? Yes, and rose coloring things just are not necessary at times.
The worst decision I ever made? When Frank and I were both 19 we bought a car that we should have never bought. We had no apartment and were still living with his father. We should have gotten an apartment and then a car. Deciding to do a voluntary reposession was a hard decision to make, but it had to be done. We just didn't think things thru on that one...but it was a nice car while we had it.
As for one of our kids making a decision that I strongly disagree with, I'm not sure at what point I would say something. I would most likely offer my opinon. If they wanted it, I would share it in a polite way so they would not think that I was judging them. If they didn't want it, then I would caution them to seriously think things thru. However, if it were something that could cause somebody harm or be in any way against the law, then all bets are off and I would definately offer up my advice to them and encourage them to choose wisely. Forcing them to do things "my way" I think would make them resent me and possibly just force them into doing as I would like them not to do.
Regret is something that we all live with. The biggest regret that I feel people face is the regret of not doing something when they should have. That's why I feel it is best to make a decision and go with it. The worst that will happen is you will have learned that you made the wrong decision, but that's how we learn. I feel that if we don't make decisions and go for them we might one day realize that we lived to regret that we didn't regret to live. That make sense to anybody but me?
Hmmm, if I could have one "undo". I honestly don't think I would use my "undo" for any moment in my life. Everything I have done or experienced helped make me who I am today, and I am pretty comfortable and satisfied with who I am. Sure I have said things in the past that I probably shouldn't have said, but were they things that were true? Yes, and rose coloring things just are not necessary at times.
The worst decision I ever made? When Frank and I were both 19 we bought a car that we should have never bought. We had no apartment and were still living with his father. We should have gotten an apartment and then a car. Deciding to do a voluntary reposession was a hard decision to make, but it had to be done. We just didn't think things thru on that one...but it was a nice car while we had it.
As for one of our kids making a decision that I strongly disagree with, I'm not sure at what point I would say something. I would most likely offer my opinon. If they wanted it, I would share it in a polite way so they would not think that I was judging them. If they didn't want it, then I would caution them to seriously think things thru. However, if it were something that could cause somebody harm or be in any way against the law, then all bets are off and I would definately offer up my advice to them and encourage them to choose wisely. Forcing them to do things "my way" I think would make them resent me and possibly just force them into doing as I would like them not to do.
Regret is something that we all live with. The biggest regret that I feel people face is the regret of not doing something when they should have. That's why I feel it is best to make a decision and go with it. The worst that will happen is you will have learned that you made the wrong decision, but that's how we learn. I feel that if we don't make decisions and go for them we might one day realize that we lived to regret that we didn't regret to live. That make sense to anybody but me?
A little interview lovin' Part 1
I recently volunteered to be interviewed by Josie from "Picking up the Pieces". (One day I'll learn how to link, I swear.) Josie put some time and some love into the questions, so I will do my best to return the thoughtful favor. And with that being said, here we go!
1. I heard a rumor that in some ways your childhood was deprived... something about not ever tasting a S'more until your adult years! Can you tell me about your first experience with S'mores? What other amazing things have you encountered for the first time since officially becoming an adult?
Ahhhh...S'mores! I believe I was 21ish when I had my first yummy s'more. Many years ago we spent like every weekend over at Spot's house having some BBQ critter, chillin, and hanging out. The kids were all pretty young and got along pretty darn good at their ages...well, DJ had not blessed the world yet but the others had. One weekend we were around the firepit and they whipped out graham crackers, marshmellows, and chocolate bars. I pondered the ingredients that sat next to us by the fire, then I was told just what in the hell they were for. Me being the sweet toothed junkie that I am exclaimed that I had never had one of the so called "s'mores" but I was up for an experiment. My announcement over never hearing of nor having a s'more brought about much teasing...then I tried one and was hooked. Those damn things are yummy as hell! I ate more s'mores that night than I care to ever tell anybody about. lmao I was so sweetly full that I felt sick. But worth every moment of it. The kids and I often make them now, even if it is s'mores by candle light. =)
Some other things I didn't try before being an adult...
Camping. The first time I went camping in anything other than a cabin was when I was 22. Different, borderline fun, but nothing I would go out of my way to do again.
Seafood. Blech!
Driving a car. I was 18 when Frank took it upon himself to teach me how to drive. So anytime he bitches about my driving, I kindly remind him who my teacher was.
Having a job. I was 20 when I got my first job. I left that job within four months but returned many years later and am still with the company, just different ownership than before.
Ummmm...I think that's it. If not, Frank and Spot will remind me and I'll add to the list. lol
1. I heard a rumor that in some ways your childhood was deprived... something about not ever tasting a S'more until your adult years! Can you tell me about your first experience with S'mores? What other amazing things have you encountered for the first time since officially becoming an adult?
Ahhhh...S'mores! I believe I was 21ish when I had my first yummy s'more. Many years ago we spent like every weekend over at Spot's house having some BBQ critter, chillin, and hanging out. The kids were all pretty young and got along pretty darn good at their ages...well, DJ had not blessed the world yet but the others had. One weekend we were around the firepit and they whipped out graham crackers, marshmellows, and chocolate bars. I pondered the ingredients that sat next to us by the fire, then I was told just what in the hell they were for. Me being the sweet toothed junkie that I am exclaimed that I had never had one of the so called "s'mores" but I was up for an experiment. My announcement over never hearing of nor having a s'more brought about much teasing...then I tried one and was hooked. Those damn things are yummy as hell! I ate more s'mores that night than I care to ever tell anybody about. lmao I was so sweetly full that I felt sick. But worth every moment of it. The kids and I often make them now, even if it is s'mores by candle light. =)
Some other things I didn't try before being an adult...
Camping. The first time I went camping in anything other than a cabin was when I was 22. Different, borderline fun, but nothing I would go out of my way to do again.
Seafood. Blech!
Driving a car. I was 18 when Frank took it upon himself to teach me how to drive. So anytime he bitches about my driving, I kindly remind him who my teacher was.
Having a job. I was 20 when I got my first job. I left that job within four months but returned many years later and am still with the company, just different ownership than before.
Ummmm...I think that's it. If not, Frank and Spot will remind me and I'll add to the list. lol
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
He started it!
Well in one of Frank's posts he mentioned that he is embarassing to take out in public. He is not wrong on that one. At times it is an embarassment that I'm not sure I can escape. I wonder at times if strangers remember me from their anonymous encounters with us in stores. Here are a few of the wretched things Frank has said and done in public. Now keep in mind these are just a few!
Many year ago while shopping in a local Rite-Aid store I was one aisle away from Frank (which I should know better than to let him out of my eyesight) when he came swaggering up to me. He was walking very bowlegged and acting like he had a full blown fire between his legs. While waddling, swaggering, and bowlegged bobbling towards me he says in a VERY loud voice "Honey I think the rash is spreading! Where do they sell the yeast infection cream?"
Another memorable one was when walking thru our local Wally World he sings every damn song. Now I don't mean quietly and in tune. I am talking at the top of his damn lungs, with a southern twang, and so off key I am sure there were dogs miles away howling along. Did he stop when face to face with the poor lady who checked us out? Oh hell no! He kept going. And she smiled and said "It's always good to see people enjoy themselves and have fun." Like I needed her to encourage his ass!
One that got me and the kids walking quickly away from him was when on a grocery trip I sent him off to get some soda. I knew he would get a few 2liters but didn't imagine that he would also grab some toilet paper while over that way. How did I know he picked up toilet paper as well? Well, the kids and I heard an odd noise. Like a thump, thump, thump, thump. A few moments apart in the thumping but a very paced thumping. As we all turned around at the same time we see Frank. With his arms loaded down with 2liters of soad, kicking a HUGE 24 pack of toilet paper down the freaking aisle! I was horrified and we turned to get away from him as quickly as possible. But then reality set in and we all knew that not only would he chase us down while kicking the huge pack of toilet paper down aisles but that soon he would be calling our names! We had no choice but to go closer to him and make him stop!
My all time most horrifying time in public?
Once again walking the Wally World, he looks at me innocently and asks in his loud tone of smugness "Remember that time the police arrested you for abusing me?" Naturally my mouth fell open and I swatted his arm and said "Shut the hell up!" which only made him quip "You know if you keep hitting me they could arrest you again." I simply could not walk fast enough trying to escape him for I knew he would not let it go...which he didn't until the kids were almost breathless from laughing so hard.
Some other things he likes to do in public?
Hide behind aisles to leap out and holler "Boo" as I turn the corner.
Squat down in a very dramatic way to scratch himself. Yes, there!
Walk like he has a MAJOR disability and make insane faces to match.
In furniture stores, he leaps onto the beds. Not just lay on them, leap onto them.
Gosh, I think I have blocked all the other things from my memory. I know there are more, just my mind won't let them escape from memory. Thank goodness!
Many year ago while shopping in a local Rite-Aid store I was one aisle away from Frank (which I should know better than to let him out of my eyesight) when he came swaggering up to me. He was walking very bowlegged and acting like he had a full blown fire between his legs. While waddling, swaggering, and bowlegged bobbling towards me he says in a VERY loud voice "Honey I think the rash is spreading! Where do they sell the yeast infection cream?"
Another memorable one was when walking thru our local Wally World he sings every damn song. Now I don't mean quietly and in tune. I am talking at the top of his damn lungs, with a southern twang, and so off key I am sure there were dogs miles away howling along. Did he stop when face to face with the poor lady who checked us out? Oh hell no! He kept going. And she smiled and said "It's always good to see people enjoy themselves and have fun." Like I needed her to encourage his ass!
One that got me and the kids walking quickly away from him was when on a grocery trip I sent him off to get some soda. I knew he would get a few 2liters but didn't imagine that he would also grab some toilet paper while over that way. How did I know he picked up toilet paper as well? Well, the kids and I heard an odd noise. Like a thump, thump, thump, thump. A few moments apart in the thumping but a very paced thumping. As we all turned around at the same time we see Frank. With his arms loaded down with 2liters of soad, kicking a HUGE 24 pack of toilet paper down the freaking aisle! I was horrified and we turned to get away from him as quickly as possible. But then reality set in and we all knew that not only would he chase us down while kicking the huge pack of toilet paper down aisles but that soon he would be calling our names! We had no choice but to go closer to him and make him stop!
My all time most horrifying time in public?
Once again walking the Wally World, he looks at me innocently and asks in his loud tone of smugness "Remember that time the police arrested you for abusing me?" Naturally my mouth fell open and I swatted his arm and said "Shut the hell up!" which only made him quip "You know if you keep hitting me they could arrest you again." I simply could not walk fast enough trying to escape him for I knew he would not let it go...which he didn't until the kids were almost breathless from laughing so hard.
Some other things he likes to do in public?
Hide behind aisles to leap out and holler "Boo" as I turn the corner.
Squat down in a very dramatic way to scratch himself. Yes, there!
Walk like he has a MAJOR disability and make insane faces to match.
In furniture stores, he leaps onto the beds. Not just lay on them, leap onto them.
Gosh, I think I have blocked all the other things from my memory. I know there are more, just my mind won't let them escape from memory. Thank goodness!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
By request...What's not to like about Frank
This could so easily get out of control and very quickly. I find myself sitting here wondering if I should be a smart ass or not. So I will go with the not.
We have been together 16 years and married for 14 of those. Naturally there are good things and bad, for both of us.
His procrastination bugs the poopies out of me. However, it is a trait that I have come to love about him. His procrastination is him. Frank does not stress out about anything, and when I say anything I mean ANYTHING! I have no damn idea how it is possible, but he does it. So in turn, it's not something that bothers me but it's something that I envy and that in turn causes it to bother me. So I'm not sure it is a bad thing, just something I am jealous of.
Other than that, well, that's it. I'm not saying that my honey does not have his flaws, but do I want to really sit here and think of what they are? Not really. I would hate to think that he would do that to me. And I honestly try to do to others what I would want them to do for me.
For any of the things that Frank does that cause me a tinge of irritation, there are so many more that I appreciate and look forward to.
The way he looks at me even when he's mad.
The way he holds me to his chest and rests his chin on my head while hugging me.
The way he says my name.
The way he smells. (Most of the time! lmfao)
His smile.
His compassion.
His love.
The children we created together.
The life we built.
The name he gave to me.
All of him.
But not his fucking cat! That damn thing is honest to god trying to kill me and I swear it! I see the evil intent in his eyes right before he runs between my legs as I try to take the first step downstairs. But I'll always be nice to the damn cat. Why? Because Patches shares my love for Frank, even if the cat does try to kill me.
So in the end, there is nothing that Frank does or is that I dislike to the point that I would ever even think of changing.
We have been together 16 years and married for 14 of those. Naturally there are good things and bad, for both of us.
His procrastination bugs the poopies out of me. However, it is a trait that I have come to love about him. His procrastination is him. Frank does not stress out about anything, and when I say anything I mean ANYTHING! I have no damn idea how it is possible, but he does it. So in turn, it's not something that bothers me but it's something that I envy and that in turn causes it to bother me. So I'm not sure it is a bad thing, just something I am jealous of.
Other than that, well, that's it. I'm not saying that my honey does not have his flaws, but do I want to really sit here and think of what they are? Not really. I would hate to think that he would do that to me. And I honestly try to do to others what I would want them to do for me.
For any of the things that Frank does that cause me a tinge of irritation, there are so many more that I appreciate and look forward to.
The way he looks at me even when he's mad.
The way he holds me to his chest and rests his chin on my head while hugging me.
The way he says my name.
The way he smells. (Most of the time! lmfao)
His smile.
His compassion.
His love.
The children we created together.
The life we built.
The name he gave to me.
All of him.
But not his fucking cat! That damn thing is honest to god trying to kill me and I swear it! I see the evil intent in his eyes right before he runs between my legs as I try to take the first step downstairs. But I'll always be nice to the damn cat. Why? Because Patches shares my love for Frank, even if the cat does try to kill me.
So in the end, there is nothing that Frank does or is that I dislike to the point that I would ever even think of changing.
I feel as though I should blog
I just have no damn clue what to blog about. No really interesting stories about work. Not much happening on the home front. No crazy relatives to blog about.
Could it be that things are normal right now? I just so don't see that being the case around here!
If things change, I'll blog.
Shit, now I'm like Frank! Telling people I have nothing to blog about as I sit here and type. It's like my brain is saying "Stop typing. Stop typing." But my fingers just keep on going. Maybe they just need their exercise. After all, I spent a small fortune learing transcription and how to type a million miles a minute. So why not use that?
See? Still typing! WTF? I'll just blame Frank's ass for this one. Damn man of mine!
Could it be that things are normal right now? I just so don't see that being the case around here!
If things change, I'll blog.
Shit, now I'm like Frank! Telling people I have nothing to blog about as I sit here and type. It's like my brain is saying "Stop typing. Stop typing." But my fingers just keep on going. Maybe they just need their exercise. After all, I spent a small fortune learing transcription and how to type a million miles a minute. So why not use that?
See? Still typing! WTF? I'll just blame Frank's ass for this one. Damn man of mine!
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Why do I relay?
In 2003 my mother was diagnosed with Endometrial cancer. She had to undergo a hysterectomy which was painful and difficult for her. Tests following the surgery showed that she was cancer free.
Not even a year later in 2004 she was diagnosed with breast cancer. This time it was a little more agressive. She had to endure another surgery to remove the cancer cells in her breast and then many treatments of radiation. Not even half way thru her treatment cycles she showed me why it was so painful. The memory of the pained look on her face as she slowly lowered her bra strap will always be in my mind as the moment I realized I HAD to do something.
The radiation had caused the skin on her breast to become burned. With the exception of the still healing scar, her breast was black. She said it felt like a torturing sunburn that there was no escape from. Just having her clothing brush up against the skin caused agonizing pain. The tears I can't forget. The ache in her words, the pain in her voice, and the desperation in her hug.
Three years later she is still cancer free. She will always have to see an oncologist for testing, but now it's down to yearly appointments.
If you can't be apart of a Relay for Life team, help support them in any way possible if you can. Nobody volunteers to get cancer yet millions volunteer to fight it. We can't stop until cancer is no longer a threatening word. Until then, I will relay.
I relay for my mother.
I relay for the mother-in-law I lost to cancer before I got to meet her.
I relay for the health of my children.
I relay for me.
I relay for you.
I relay so that one day cancer won't be a horrifying experience.
I relay for a cure that is sure to come.
Not even a year later in 2004 she was diagnosed with breast cancer. This time it was a little more agressive. She had to endure another surgery to remove the cancer cells in her breast and then many treatments of radiation. Not even half way thru her treatment cycles she showed me why it was so painful. The memory of the pained look on her face as she slowly lowered her bra strap will always be in my mind as the moment I realized I HAD to do something.
The radiation had caused the skin on her breast to become burned. With the exception of the still healing scar, her breast was black. She said it felt like a torturing sunburn that there was no escape from. Just having her clothing brush up against the skin caused agonizing pain. The tears I can't forget. The ache in her words, the pain in her voice, and the desperation in her hug.
Three years later she is still cancer free. She will always have to see an oncologist for testing, but now it's down to yearly appointments.
If you can't be apart of a Relay for Life team, help support them in any way possible if you can. Nobody volunteers to get cancer yet millions volunteer to fight it. We can't stop until cancer is no longer a threatening word. Until then, I will relay.
I relay for my mother.
I relay for the mother-in-law I lost to cancer before I got to meet her.
I relay for the health of my children.
I relay for me.
I relay for you.
I relay so that one day cancer won't be a horrifying experience.
I relay for a cure that is sure to come.
All about the Relay
The Relay for Life that our team is apart of was this last weekend. The actual Relay had it's opening lap at 9:00am Saturday and then closing ceremony and final lap were at 9:00am Sunday. Lemme tell ya, the hours inbetween were dang cold! The overnight hours were the worst! It got below freezing as the ice on everything proved in the wee morning hours.
Thank goodness we had a camper to help shelter the kids overnight for a few hours. Aside from the four hours we spent in the camper, we wore darn near everything we owned and snuggled under blankets.
The goal for our Relay, which has several teams apart of it, was to raise $90,000 by the end of the 24 hour period. Now, fundraising starts in January so the goal is not completely unrealistic. Last year we finished the Relay with a grand total of $73,000 being raised for the 9 month period.
Going into the Relay weekend we had raised $70,000! So all we had to do was raise $20,000 in 24 hours. Not super hard as long as we all kept at it and stayed creative.
Our team did our usual baked goods sale, we had a Miss Relay (Frank rocked it and helped our team out a bunch, thank you sweetie), and ran a "jail". The jail turned out to be something super fun and very lucrative. All one had to do was pay us a $1 donation and we would "lock up" the person of their choosing. Then once the "prisoner" was in the jail cell, they had to raise $5 bail money to be released. A fun idea that led to an amazing amount of donations!
All said and done, once we were unfrozen, our team contributed a total so far of just over $7,000! At closing cermony time, and donations are still to come in the next few months, our Relay group raised just over $100,000!!! Going above and beyond all of our expectations!
While we are doing our part to help fight cancer and fund research, I hope that everybody will do their part in donating. We simply can't stop doing everything we can until cancer is stopped. Every single penny counts.
Thank goodness we had a camper to help shelter the kids overnight for a few hours. Aside from the four hours we spent in the camper, we wore darn near everything we owned and snuggled under blankets.
The goal for our Relay, which has several teams apart of it, was to raise $90,000 by the end of the 24 hour period. Now, fundraising starts in January so the goal is not completely unrealistic. Last year we finished the Relay with a grand total of $73,000 being raised for the 9 month period.
Going into the Relay weekend we had raised $70,000! So all we had to do was raise $20,000 in 24 hours. Not super hard as long as we all kept at it and stayed creative.
Our team did our usual baked goods sale, we had a Miss Relay (Frank rocked it and helped our team out a bunch, thank you sweetie), and ran a "jail". The jail turned out to be something super fun and very lucrative. All one had to do was pay us a $1 donation and we would "lock up" the person of their choosing. Then once the "prisoner" was in the jail cell, they had to raise $5 bail money to be released. A fun idea that led to an amazing amount of donations!
All said and done, once we were unfrozen, our team contributed a total so far of just over $7,000! At closing cermony time, and donations are still to come in the next few months, our Relay group raised just over $100,000!!! Going above and beyond all of our expectations!
While we are doing our part to help fight cancer and fund research, I hope that everybody will do their part in donating. We simply can't stop doing everything we can until cancer is stopped. Every single penny counts.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Last & Spot, your bill is ready
Holy shit you two boys! I just got the phone bill...you two owe my ass! Three collect phone calls...do you even want to guess how much you two boys owe me? Holy fucking shit! Absolutely livid...then I read Frank's blog. How the hell am I supposed to stay mad now?
Friday, September 7, 2007
The worst week with the best husband
Last weekend was super, duper great after a crappy start. I pulled a double shift on Friday so that I could have Saturday off and go back to school shopping with the kids and hubby. I get home about 3:30am and crawl into bed after unwinding a bit. I think it was like 4:30am or so. Then I hear a tiny whisper "When are we going shopping?"
Peeking at the clock I see it's only 8am, so I smile at the excited teenager and tell her in a few hours. Skip ahead to 10am and repeat the same tiny whisper "When are we going shopping?"
Well hell, I can't kill her enthusiasm so I tell her to make sure her brothers are up and I'll get Daddy up.
We hit the road before 11 and don't get home until just after 8pm. TONS of shopping bags with more than enough crap for three kids to go back to school. I'm off to bed because I had to be at work twelve hours from then.
Work my usual nine hour shift on Sunday and then come home and do about ten loads of laundry for the back to school stuff. See, I told you that we bought way too much!
Then off to work on Monday with a tiny tickle in my chest. Labor Day Monday in a restaurant...CRAZY!!! But it was a good day. The hubby even finished up the laundry for me while I was at work.
Tuesday...oh hell! I head to work after waking up feeling like crap. It's our time for our "Team Meeting" which means I have to gather paperwork, drive an hour away, sit thru a meeting, and then drive back home. I barely made it home because I felt like such poopie I had a wicked time keeping my eyes open. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't stop coughing. My eyes were watering. Wretched day that extended into the night.
Wednesday I took the day off work, mostly because I was up the whole night before coughing and tossing my cookies. I laid at home all day wondering how soon I would just die from being so miserably sick. Hubby of mine brought home some medicine for me, thank goodness! Then the most precious thing happened.
He walked me to bed after giving me some medicine to help me sleep, layed a cool towel on my head, and massaged my aching body as I fell asleep! And it is with little surprise that I awoke feeling so much better. While not back to normal yet, with the loving care of an amazing husband I feel much better...and can almost breathe normal again.
Two months in a row with two colds? What's that about? I'm never sick! If it happens next month I really hope the hubby is still patient with me.
Well, I'm off to rest some more and moderate the argument with the girl and the hubby. She wormed her way into playing the game he is heavily addicted to and now he's kinda pouting but does not have the heart to shove her off his computer. Shhhhhh...don't tell him that I am letting his soft side out.
Peeking at the clock I see it's only 8am, so I smile at the excited teenager and tell her in a few hours. Skip ahead to 10am and repeat the same tiny whisper "When are we going shopping?"
Well hell, I can't kill her enthusiasm so I tell her to make sure her brothers are up and I'll get Daddy up.
We hit the road before 11 and don't get home until just after 8pm. TONS of shopping bags with more than enough crap for three kids to go back to school. I'm off to bed because I had to be at work twelve hours from then.
Work my usual nine hour shift on Sunday and then come home and do about ten loads of laundry for the back to school stuff. See, I told you that we bought way too much!
Then off to work on Monday with a tiny tickle in my chest. Labor Day Monday in a restaurant...CRAZY!!! But it was a good day. The hubby even finished up the laundry for me while I was at work.
Tuesday...oh hell! I head to work after waking up feeling like crap. It's our time for our "Team Meeting" which means I have to gather paperwork, drive an hour away, sit thru a meeting, and then drive back home. I barely made it home because I felt like such poopie I had a wicked time keeping my eyes open. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't stop coughing. My eyes were watering. Wretched day that extended into the night.
Wednesday I took the day off work, mostly because I was up the whole night before coughing and tossing my cookies. I laid at home all day wondering how soon I would just die from being so miserably sick. Hubby of mine brought home some medicine for me, thank goodness! Then the most precious thing happened.
He walked me to bed after giving me some medicine to help me sleep, layed a cool towel on my head, and massaged my aching body as I fell asleep! And it is with little surprise that I awoke feeling so much better. While not back to normal yet, with the loving care of an amazing husband I feel much better...and can almost breathe normal again.
Two months in a row with two colds? What's that about? I'm never sick! If it happens next month I really hope the hubby is still patient with me.
Well, I'm off to rest some more and moderate the argument with the girl and the hubby. She wormed her way into playing the game he is heavily addicted to and now he's kinda pouting but does not have the heart to shove her off his computer. Shhhhhh...don't tell him that I am letting his soft side out.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
A meme from Josie
The Instructions:
Proposition: If you Have $1,000,000.00…
Requirements: Write a post about what you would do with the money
Tag: 5 other bloggers
Link: Add your anchor and post link to the list below
First off let me say this, I didn't copy the "anchor" thing and post my link because I am not that smart to figure out how. Second off, I don't have 5 people in my little list to "tag" so those who wander over please leave a comment on here to leave me a trail to come read your wishes for the money.
What would I do with a million $? And I am going with Josie on that it's tax free. I pay enough taxes with my paychecks!
First I would pay off the house and do a little remodeling to it. New deck, new driveway, flatten out the land, and redo the kitchen.
Next I would buy my mother a nice little condo nearby. She has worked her ass off in her lifetime and I would give absolutely anything to be able to do that for her to help ease her worries of paying rent.
Then I would set up an account for each kiddo for whatever their dreams may be after High School. I would like to see them each use it for College, but if that is not what their lives have planned for them then they may use it as they wish. If they use it for frivilous things, then that is a lesson they will have to learn for themselves. It's best to make a decision, stick with it, and learn from it if it was the good decision to make or not.
After that, I'm just not sure. Perhaps a grand family vacation. Something unexpected and full of fun for all of us to share together. I would just make sure that using the money would build memories we could all enjoy for a lifetime.
Proposition: If you Have $1,000,000.00…
Requirements: Write a post about what you would do with the money
Tag: 5 other bloggers
Link: Add your anchor and post link to the list below
First off let me say this, I didn't copy the "anchor" thing and post my link because I am not that smart to figure out how. Second off, I don't have 5 people in my little list to "tag" so those who wander over please leave a comment on here to leave me a trail to come read your wishes for the money.
What would I do with a million $? And I am going with Josie on that it's tax free. I pay enough taxes with my paychecks!
First I would pay off the house and do a little remodeling to it. New deck, new driveway, flatten out the land, and redo the kitchen.
Next I would buy my mother a nice little condo nearby. She has worked her ass off in her lifetime and I would give absolutely anything to be able to do that for her to help ease her worries of paying rent.
Then I would set up an account for each kiddo for whatever their dreams may be after High School. I would like to see them each use it for College, but if that is not what their lives have planned for them then they may use it as they wish. If they use it for frivilous things, then that is a lesson they will have to learn for themselves. It's best to make a decision, stick with it, and learn from it if it was the good decision to make or not.
After that, I'm just not sure. Perhaps a grand family vacation. Something unexpected and full of fun for all of us to share together. I would just make sure that using the money would build memories we could all enjoy for a lifetime.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Last one for tonight.
I hunted and hunted in myspace for this one. Because even at the time that it was happening, I laughed my butt off. Posting it there, laughed my butt off. Rereading it, giggling tons. Hope you enjoy.
OH! So, gossip time! I step out of the shower yesterday and on my machine is a message but the first part was cut off because it was a machine talking to my machine. I only caught..."an inmate and the County Jail. To accept the charge of $4.50 please press 1." So my first thought is...is TGOMATOEOT in town? LMFAO ( A friend who will remain anonymous but whom several years earlier actually was on the other end of that recording at 3am! But he does not live around her anymore, so I assume it is not him...I hoped!) So who the hell is sitting in jail and trying to call me to see if I will bail them out?
Phone call #1 - Sherriff department. The cranky secretary says "No ma'am" She cannot tell me who has been recently arrested so I can let her know if I care enough about the person to bail them out. She probally thinks I am a mean bitch, but wtf do I care?
Phone call #2 - Husband at work. "OK, if you are at work then you are not in jail" His response, "Why the fu*k would I be in jail?" I explain that I know he had not been feeling well, so thought maybe he had left work early, got pulled over, got pissy with the officer, punched that officer, and was now in jail. Hubby says I have too much of an imagination! Hope he is not the next jailbird to call me cuz I might leave his butt there and then mention his previous comment to him when he asks why I am not bailing him out!
Phone call #3 - Sister at work. "OK, if you are at work then you are not in jail." Apparently this comment of mine offended her deeply! WTF? I am just trying to be a concerned family/friend of whomever has been arrested and shouldn't she care that I called to make sure it was not her? Put her down at person #2 that I will not bail out in the future if needed!
Phone call #4 - Sister at work again. "Your husband at work?" Her reply, "Why would he be in jail?" My response, "Why the fu*k would anybody I know be in jail?" Christ, I am just trying to be a caring individual! Definately put her down as person that I will not bail out in the future if needed!
Phone call #5 - Brother-in-law and his wife. Their 5 year old answered. "Is mommy or daddy home?" He says "yup" and that is quickly followed by him giving his mom the phone. "Is your husband home?" She says yes, do I need to talk to him? I say "Nope, just checking to make sure you two are not in jail." Thank GOD she actually laughed! So I tell her my tale so far, and she appreciated that I took the time to make sure that it was not them! Ok, I will bail those two out if needed in the near future.
Phone call #6 - Mother at work. So after needling my way thru their computer answering device, I get the secretary who tells me that her shift had the day off. UH-OH! Could Granny (my poor mother is the Grandma of my 3 and my sister's 3 at the ripe old age of 58 and we all call her Granny) be in jail? Now my mind is racing! What if she got pulled over by a cop, got emotional, he/she asked Granny to step outside the vehicle, she declines the offer, is "assisted" out of the vehicle, gets upset, and punches the officer? She COULD be in jail!
Phone call #7- Mother at home. The machine answers! This is looking bleak for poor ol' Granny! Could my mother be in jail? Holy crap!
Phone call #8 - Sister at work for the third time. "Have you seen our mother?" All cranky she asks, "Why would mom be in jail?" Did she hear me thinking "Why the fu*k would anybody I know be in jail" earlier? So no, she has not heard from her and did not know that Mom had the day off work. We do not know her cell phone number because she NEVER, I repeat NEVER has the damn thing turned on! So I tell sister, "If you hear from Mom, let me know." We get off the phone and I definately will not bail sister out if needed in the future.
Phone call #9 - My work. I ask if a younger friend of mine who is like a daughter to me is at work because she has had trouble in her life in previous years and I just want to rule her out. She was at work and A-OK! And, she appreciated me checking up on her even though she found it funny that i checked. I will bail her out in the future if needed.
I receive a phone call! "So you think I would punch a cop" my Mother asks! Thank god she is laughing and not in jail! I run my phone calls down to her to let her know how much of a caring daughter she had raised! She laughs and says I need a hobby! WTF? OK, might sound cruel, but she might be person #3 that I don't bail out in the future if needed. lol
It is at this point I assume it is my husband's stepmother's son. Long story short, or is it too late for that? It turns out it was him, and I did not care enough to bail his butt out! But, somebody else did.
Was it better that I not post this in the first place? If you answered yes, please let me know so I may put you down on my list of "Will not bail out if needed in the future."
Lovingly yours,
Chele
OH! So, gossip time! I step out of the shower yesterday and on my machine is a message but the first part was cut off because it was a machine talking to my machine. I only caught..."an inmate and the County Jail. To accept the charge of $4.50 please press 1." So my first thought is...is TGOMATOEOT in town? LMFAO ( A friend who will remain anonymous but whom several years earlier actually was on the other end of that recording at 3am! But he does not live around her anymore, so I assume it is not him...I hoped!) So who the hell is sitting in jail and trying to call me to see if I will bail them out?
Phone call #1 - Sherriff department. The cranky secretary says "No ma'am" She cannot tell me who has been recently arrested so I can let her know if I care enough about the person to bail them out. She probally thinks I am a mean bitch, but wtf do I care?
Phone call #2 - Husband at work. "OK, if you are at work then you are not in jail" His response, "Why the fu*k would I be in jail?" I explain that I know he had not been feeling well, so thought maybe he had left work early, got pulled over, got pissy with the officer, punched that officer, and was now in jail. Hubby says I have too much of an imagination! Hope he is not the next jailbird to call me cuz I might leave his butt there and then mention his previous comment to him when he asks why I am not bailing him out!
Phone call #3 - Sister at work. "OK, if you are at work then you are not in jail." Apparently this comment of mine offended her deeply! WTF? I am just trying to be a concerned family/friend of whomever has been arrested and shouldn't she care that I called to make sure it was not her? Put her down at person #2 that I will not bail out in the future if needed!
Phone call #4 - Sister at work again. "Your husband at work?" Her reply, "Why would he be in jail?" My response, "Why the fu*k would anybody I know be in jail?" Christ, I am just trying to be a caring individual! Definately put her down as person that I will not bail out in the future if needed!
Phone call #5 - Brother-in-law and his wife. Their 5 year old answered. "Is mommy or daddy home?" He says "yup" and that is quickly followed by him giving his mom the phone. "Is your husband home?" She says yes, do I need to talk to him? I say "Nope, just checking to make sure you two are not in jail." Thank GOD she actually laughed! So I tell her my tale so far, and she appreciated that I took the time to make sure that it was not them! Ok, I will bail those two out if needed in the near future.
Phone call #6 - Mother at work. So after needling my way thru their computer answering device, I get the secretary who tells me that her shift had the day off. UH-OH! Could Granny (my poor mother is the Grandma of my 3 and my sister's 3 at the ripe old age of 58 and we all call her Granny) be in jail? Now my mind is racing! What if she got pulled over by a cop, got emotional, he/she asked Granny to step outside the vehicle, she declines the offer, is "assisted" out of the vehicle, gets upset, and punches the officer? She COULD be in jail!
Phone call #7- Mother at home. The machine answers! This is looking bleak for poor ol' Granny! Could my mother be in jail? Holy crap!
Phone call #8 - Sister at work for the third time. "Have you seen our mother?" All cranky she asks, "Why would mom be in jail?" Did she hear me thinking "Why the fu*k would anybody I know be in jail" earlier? So no, she has not heard from her and did not know that Mom had the day off work. We do not know her cell phone number because she NEVER, I repeat NEVER has the damn thing turned on! So I tell sister, "If you hear from Mom, let me know." We get off the phone and I definately will not bail sister out if needed in the future.
Phone call #9 - My work. I ask if a younger friend of mine who is like a daughter to me is at work because she has had trouble in her life in previous years and I just want to rule her out. She was at work and A-OK! And, she appreciated me checking up on her even though she found it funny that i checked. I will bail her out in the future if needed.
I receive a phone call! "So you think I would punch a cop" my Mother asks! Thank god she is laughing and not in jail! I run my phone calls down to her to let her know how much of a caring daughter she had raised! She laughs and says I need a hobby! WTF? OK, might sound cruel, but she might be person #3 that I don't bail out in the future if needed. lol
It is at this point I assume it is my husband's stepmother's son. Long story short, or is it too late for that? It turns out it was him, and I did not care enough to bail his butt out! But, somebody else did.
Was it better that I not post this in the first place? If you answered yes, please let me know so I may put you down on my list of "Will not bail out if needed in the future."
Lovingly yours,
Chele
I'm a lazy blogger
Reading in my old myspace blog and I found this treasure. Had to share as it brought back a very vivid memory of a giggle fit! Enjoy!
So, after a little afternoon action and hubby left for work. I decide to pay a bill or two online. I noticed something a little different about our satellite bill, so I call em up to ask why the change in due date. Don't get me wrong, they extended the due date...I just wanted to make sure it was correct.
Dear Christ, it's one of those machines where you have to talk to them. I think I prefer the ones where you punch buttons and not talk. It always makes me want to ask them about sexual things and then I will probably be sent to a whole other service...kinda like this...
"Thank you for calling DirecTV. How may I help you today? Please speak your desired option."
"Anal sex please"
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Please repeat your desired option."
"I'm sorry, ANAL SEX PLEASE."
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Please pick another option such as bill inquiry, payment arangments, payment options, or customer service."
"Oral satisfaction please."
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Please repeat your desired option."
"Fist fucking please."
"I'm sorry, you are now being transfered to our remote Physcologist location for your apparent need of therapy. Good day."
Ahhh, one day I might give it a shot to see what happens and how fast they will disconnect my fookin satellite!
But I digress. So a pleasant gentleman answers the line and I instantly recognize his voice. But from where. We chat about the bill, we are fantastic customers so they extended the due date for our convenience. Chat about weather, he is in another country. Chat about all they have to offer, and not one mention of anal sex. Then it hits me! I knew I recognized his voice!
The guy Bronson Pinchot played on Beverly Hills Cops! You know, the art guy in the gallery!
I resisted the urge to blurt that out to him. My restraint sometimes shocks me. Ahhh, it was just satisfying to figure out where I knew that voice from.
Now get the fuck out of here! lmao
So, after a little afternoon action and hubby left for work. I decide to pay a bill or two online. I noticed something a little different about our satellite bill, so I call em up to ask why the change in due date. Don't get me wrong, they extended the due date...I just wanted to make sure it was correct.
Dear Christ, it's one of those machines where you have to talk to them. I think I prefer the ones where you punch buttons and not talk. It always makes me want to ask them about sexual things and then I will probably be sent to a whole other service...kinda like this...
"Thank you for calling DirecTV. How may I help you today? Please speak your desired option."
"Anal sex please"
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Please repeat your desired option."
"I'm sorry, ANAL SEX PLEASE."
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Please pick another option such as bill inquiry, payment arangments, payment options, or customer service."
"Oral satisfaction please."
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Please repeat your desired option."
"Fist fucking please."
"I'm sorry, you are now being transfered to our remote Physcologist location for your apparent need of therapy. Good day."
Ahhh, one day I might give it a shot to see what happens and how fast they will disconnect my fookin satellite!
But I digress. So a pleasant gentleman answers the line and I instantly recognize his voice. But from where. We chat about the bill, we are fantastic customers so they extended the due date for our convenience. Chat about weather, he is in another country. Chat about all they have to offer, and not one mention of anal sex. Then it hits me! I knew I recognized his voice!
The guy Bronson Pinchot played on Beverly Hills Cops! You know, the art guy in the gallery!
I resisted the urge to blurt that out to him. My restraint sometimes shocks me. Ahhh, it was just satisfying to figure out where I knew that voice from.
Now get the fuck out of here! lmao
Hell, now I am on a roll!
40 Secrets About Yourself
Be HONEST no matter what.
1. What Is your natural hair color?
Honestly: Light brown with tons of other colors in it. I dunno, but I like it.
2. Where was your default pic taken?
Honestly: In the daughter's room. Isn't the snuggly Spot cute?
3. What's your middle name?
Honestly: Jo.
4. Your current relationship status?
Honestly: Head over heels in love with the hubby...so married.
5. Honestly, does your crush like you back?
Honestly: He fucking better!
6. What is your current mood?
Honestly: Frisky...as usual.
7.What color underwear are you wearing?
Honestly: Pink lacy boy short panties.
8.What makes you happy?
Honestly: Love, and slacking off.
10. If you could go back in time, and change something what would it be?
Honestly: Hmmm, I am not sure I would. Well, except for skipping school that one day with Frank. Still feel guilty about it.
11. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day- what would you be?
Honestly: A white tiger, no thought there.
12. Ever had a near death experience?
Honestly: Don't think so.
13. Something you do a lot?
Honestly: Be a smart ass.
14. What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
Honestly: "You sang to Me" by Marc Anthony
15. Who did you copy and paste this from?
Honestly: My own damn blog. Is that ok with you?
16. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
Honestly: OMG, that I do not know. Nobody that I know of.
17. When was the last time you cried?
Honestly: A few weeks ago.
18. Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
Honestly: How large? 50 or less peeps, yeah.
19. If you could have one super power what would it be?
Honestly: Ohhh mind reading! I am a nosey bitch!
20. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite/same sex?
Honestly: Arms and chest. Men and women alike. But for different reasons.
21. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
Honestly: Screw them, we beat them in a taste test!!!
22. What's your biggest secret?
Honestly: Like I can keep a secret!
23. What's your favorite color(s)?
Honestly: Green.
24. When was the last time you lied?
Honestly: Hmm, I dunno. Prolly at work to make an employee shut the hell up.
25. Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
Honestly: Not unless I am forced to do so.
27. What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
Honestly: Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi *Yummy*
28. Do you speak any other language?
Honestly: Pig-latin and Spanglish
29. What's your favorite smell?
Honestly: I have no idea! Sex? Does that smell? lmfao
30. If you could describe your life in one word what would it be?
Honestly: SHIT! Just teasing. I can't say anything in ONE word!
31. When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
Honestly: A wee bit ago.
32. Have you ever been kissed in the rain?
Honestly: Yes, very sexy.
33. What are you thinking about right now?
Honestly: Well now I am thinking about sex from that last question. But I think about sex alot!
34. What should you be doing?
Honestly: Sleeping.
35. What was the last thing that made you upset/angry?
Honestly: An employee.
36. How often do you pray?
Honestly: Often enough for me.
37. Do you like working in the yard?
Honestly: Not really. I usually hire somebody to do it.
38. If you could have any last name in the world, what would you
want?
Honestly: Powers. I cherish that he gave me his last name.
39. Do you act differently around your crush?
Honestly: Yeah, I crank up the flirty with da hubby.
40. Name one song that reminds you of a cow?
Honestly: WTF! Old McDonald had a farm?
Be HONEST no matter what.
1. What Is your natural hair color?
Honestly: Light brown with tons of other colors in it. I dunno, but I like it.
2. Where was your default pic taken?
Honestly: In the daughter's room. Isn't the snuggly Spot cute?
3. What's your middle name?
Honestly: Jo.
4. Your current relationship status?
Honestly: Head over heels in love with the hubby...so married.
5. Honestly, does your crush like you back?
Honestly: He fucking better!
6. What is your current mood?
Honestly: Frisky...as usual.
7.What color underwear are you wearing?
Honestly: Pink lacy boy short panties.
8.What makes you happy?
Honestly: Love, and slacking off.
10. If you could go back in time, and change something what would it be?
Honestly: Hmmm, I am not sure I would. Well, except for skipping school that one day with Frank. Still feel guilty about it.
11. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day- what would you be?
Honestly: A white tiger, no thought there.
12. Ever had a near death experience?
Honestly: Don't think so.
13. Something you do a lot?
Honestly: Be a smart ass.
14. What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
Honestly: "You sang to Me" by Marc Anthony
15. Who did you copy and paste this from?
Honestly: My own damn blog. Is that ok with you?
16. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
Honestly: OMG, that I do not know. Nobody that I know of.
17. When was the last time you cried?
Honestly: A few weeks ago.
18. Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
Honestly: How large? 50 or less peeps, yeah.
19. If you could have one super power what would it be?
Honestly: Ohhh mind reading! I am a nosey bitch!
20. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite/same sex?
Honestly: Arms and chest. Men and women alike. But for different reasons.
21. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
Honestly: Screw them, we beat them in a taste test!!!
22. What's your biggest secret?
Honestly: Like I can keep a secret!
23. What's your favorite color(s)?
Honestly: Green.
24. When was the last time you lied?
Honestly: Hmm, I dunno. Prolly at work to make an employee shut the hell up.
25. Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
Honestly: Not unless I am forced to do so.
27. What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
Honestly: Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi *Yummy*
28. Do you speak any other language?
Honestly: Pig-latin and Spanglish
29. What's your favorite smell?
Honestly: I have no idea! Sex? Does that smell? lmfao
30. If you could describe your life in one word what would it be?
Honestly: SHIT! Just teasing. I can't say anything in ONE word!
31. When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
Honestly: A wee bit ago.
32. Have you ever been kissed in the rain?
Honestly: Yes, very sexy.
33. What are you thinking about right now?
Honestly: Well now I am thinking about sex from that last question. But I think about sex alot!
34. What should you be doing?
Honestly: Sleeping.
35. What was the last thing that made you upset/angry?
Honestly: An employee.
36. How often do you pray?
Honestly: Often enough for me.
37. Do you like working in the yard?
Honestly: Not really. I usually hire somebody to do it.
38. If you could have any last name in the world, what would you
want?
Honestly: Powers. I cherish that he gave me his last name.
39. Do you act differently around your crush?
Honestly: Yeah, I crank up the flirty with da hubby.
40. Name one song that reminds you of a cow?
Honestly: WTF! Old McDonald had a farm?
Friday, May 25, 2007
This won't evolve much
Pretty much needed an account. I barely blog at my other blog space so don't expect much out of this one.
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